Verbotene Liebe today was very special, because we got to meet Sebastian's cute ex.
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D'awww, aren't they sweet? You know I adore Tanja, but I have to wonder why he let that one go... Whatever, that's not why we're here. Not when there's desperate money-making plot to be covered!

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Sascha and Olli are wondering how Emilio is going to get the €30,000 together to pay for the curry van. Well, Olli is wondering. Sascha seems to think that it'll just appear from somewhere and everything will be fine - because he is the one with street smarts. But they both agree that the offer is too good to be passed up.
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Therefore, they need schemes. They both have an idea of how to get Emilio some money so will compete for Emilio's approval, and whoever wins gets to smile and gaze into the other's eyes for a bit or something.
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Boys, it's cheating if you do that anyway before the competition's even started...

Olli gets to pitch his idea to Emilio first. Since Emilio was so good at stripping that one time he turned up for rehearsal and his knee wasn't broken, Olli has found a job for him as a model for an erotic gay calendar which will earn him a lovely €2000. But Emilio is reluctant.
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Shall we fast-forward through Emilio's pathetic attempts to justify his own homophobia? It's mostly just "Ewwwww, gays, ewwww! ...Though of course I don't have a problem with you, Olli.".
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Olli is naturally flattered. Essentially he tells Emilio to get over himself or to go and find a different job, and Emilio opts for the latter.
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He finds Sascha and tells him about Olli's offer, at which point Sascha dies of laughing at the idea of anyone wanking over pictures of Emilio. But he's more understanding of Emilio's objections and tells him he has a much better opportunity. As a test subject for new medicines.
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Olli overhears this plan and has a couple of tiny concerns, about how consuming drugs that are untested on humans might actually a bit dangerous.
Sascha: "Better that than posing for some homo magazine."
Olli: "Bit odd for you to be saying that, don't you think?"
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Sascha explains that the whole thing is risk free, after all the drugs have been tested on hamsters already, and the worse that can happen is you get a headache which is worth it for €3000. Olli innocently asks about those 4 people in England who ended up in a coma with organ failure after trying test medicines (I assume he means this, if you're wondering). Sascha is not worried though, because that was obviously caused by England being rubbish and full of foamless beer. (Which I will let slide because if I start taking offence at baseless stereotypes then I fear this blog will implode in hypocrisy.) And Sascha's been taking a whole cocktail of the drugs for ages and has experienced no problems, so obviously it will all be fine. I'm beginning to wonder what Sascha spends all his money on - he has a job at LCL, he has (had?) all these deals going on, he did the video for Jens, and he's a medical test subject as well now... I mean, what does he do with it? Does he have child support to pay or something?
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Olli is unconvinced, and Emilio goes off to consider his options. By which I mean, pose for a bit in front of his mirror while practising what he imagines gay sexy talk is like, and then get very embarrassed when his wife walks in.
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He tries to ask Kim what she thinks he should do while not actually mentioning any of the options or even conceding that he's talking about himself. The conclusion of the conversation is that Kim says he can be a callgirl if he really wants, but only if she's his only client. Cue some odd dream sequences, in the first Emilio makes Louis Spence look unflamboyant and complains about Kim borrowing his lady razor.
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In the second, he's in bed with Olli. Promptly he screams and wakes up from this terrible, appalling, grotesque nightmare, that I'm sure none of us would wish on our worst enemies..
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Hellish.

His subconscious having made the decision for him, he heads off to the medical testing lab. He gets prodded and probed and eventually they've decided he's fit, he only has to sign the contract, and he's ready. He's a bit unsure and it seems a very long contract to read, but thankfully buddy Sascha appears and tells him no one bothers to read those things, just sign it, because apparently the going rate for test subjects has that minute gone up from €3000 to €3300. Now, no disrespect, but you'd think especially in Germany they would be a bit more worried about this level of hyperinflation, 10% overnight is not sustainable. Schäuble needs to get his act together.
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Anyway, at the last moment Ricardo appears to tell Emilio what an idiot he's being and he needs to at least acquaint himself with the actual risks and potential side-effects of what he's doing. At which point I was imagining some sort of Testees type scenario...so what is it Ricky? Total memory loss? Paralyses through muscle relaxants? Temporary gender reassignment?
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Oh, not to worry, apparently it's only impotence.
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...Poor Olli, now even if he does get Sascha he'll have to put up with the homophobic slurs and him not being able to perform~.
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